Today was the best morning and the worst morning. Kate woke up at 5 a.m., which was thirty minutes before my alarm usually goes off. (Isn’t it funny how our children seem to know how long you want to sleep and magically wake you up right before that?) I got up, fed her, changed her and got her ready for the day. Then I decided I could spare an extra twenty minutes to go back to sleep. (Yes, feel free to judge. I am a snooze pusher and a power napper whenever possible. So sue me). I put Kate back in her crib and lied down in my bed.
Within seconds, she decided she didn’t want to go back to bed. She wanted to play. So, in her playful way she screamed; not an angry or an "I’m hungry," scream, just a very loud playful scream. About a week ago, she discovered her voice. She thinks it’s hilarious to scream as loud as she can just to hear herself. Therefore, I have a baby velociraptor in my house. This baby velociraptor screamed and screamed, loud enough to wake up her daddy and loud enough to keep mommy from her power nap.
We decided to go get her and lay her in our bed to snuggle us for the last few minutes of our morning before the business of the day began. Believe it or not, I’m describing why this morning was the best morning. It was the best morning because in those last moments, my baby girl laid between her dad and I staring into my eyes with those curious blue gems of hers and reached out and grabbed my face. Her expression changed like one of contentment and she gently closed her eyes and fell asleep clinging to my face and resting her nose on mine. It was the best morning because my baby felt comfort in the arms of her parents and was able to rest. In that moment, I wanted to freeze time. I wanted to stay forever in the arms of my two loves completely and overwhelmingly happy. But as life would have it, the alarm went off again and the work responsibilities called. For a few minutes before work, Kate woke up and we snuggled and we giggled and we played as much as time would allow.
Then it became the worst day. Though I’m being over dramatic, it felt like the worst day. It was the worst day because those moments were gone and work was calling loudly. My happy, content baby went off to Nonna’s house for the day and Erik and I parted ways to our separate jobs. It was the worst day because I wanted nothing more than to stay home with my little baby. Tears flowed after she left and I prayed, "Lord, you know the desires of my heart. Help me find a way to make these good moments last longer."
To the working mom, hang in there. If there is any miraculous way you have the luxury of staying home when your kids are babies, do it. These moments are so few and so fleeting don’t miss it if you don’t have to. But if you’re like me, that luxury is not in the cards for today. For one reason or another, there are bills that need paid, benefits that need covered and skills that have to be maintained. You do it for your family so that they can have the life you did or didn’t have. You do it to share the load with your spouse to keep the financial stress out of your family. Whatever reason we work it’s because we’ve decided we have to. It’s not easy. It’s not always what we want, but we do what we have to do. To us I say: hang in there. Use your role in working to show your child good character, diligence, and hard work. (Stay at home moms are just as good in character, diligence and hard working if not more. So don’t take this as a hit against those that stay home. I’m just pointing out a way to use the need to work to build up our children). To the working mom I say: cherish every little moment. Cherish the midnight feedings, the 2 a.m. feedings, and the 4 a.m. feedings. Cherish the snuggles when they are sick, or tired, or cranky. Cherish the giggles, the milestones, the wonder, and the excitement. Cherish it all in the moments you do have. Write them all down so you can relive those moments again. To you I say: hang in there. Every moment away is hard and I get it. For me, every moment away is harder than the last. But I encourage you to press on. You are still a good mom. You are still a GREAT mom. And by creating these precious moments every day with your baby, they will always know how much you love them no matter how many moments you miss.
Within seconds, she decided she didn’t want to go back to bed. She wanted to play. So, in her playful way she screamed; not an angry or an "I’m hungry," scream, just a very loud playful scream. About a week ago, she discovered her voice. She thinks it’s hilarious to scream as loud as she can just to hear herself. Therefore, I have a baby velociraptor in my house. This baby velociraptor screamed and screamed, loud enough to wake up her daddy and loud enough to keep mommy from her power nap.
We decided to go get her and lay her in our bed to snuggle us for the last few minutes of our morning before the business of the day began. Believe it or not, I’m describing why this morning was the best morning. It was the best morning because in those last moments, my baby girl laid between her dad and I staring into my eyes with those curious blue gems of hers and reached out and grabbed my face. Her expression changed like one of contentment and she gently closed her eyes and fell asleep clinging to my face and resting her nose on mine. It was the best morning because my baby felt comfort in the arms of her parents and was able to rest. In that moment, I wanted to freeze time. I wanted to stay forever in the arms of my two loves completely and overwhelmingly happy. But as life would have it, the alarm went off again and the work responsibilities called. For a few minutes before work, Kate woke up and we snuggled and we giggled and we played as much as time would allow.
Then it became the worst day. Though I’m being over dramatic, it felt like the worst day. It was the worst day because those moments were gone and work was calling loudly. My happy, content baby went off to Nonna’s house for the day and Erik and I parted ways to our separate jobs. It was the worst day because I wanted nothing more than to stay home with my little baby. Tears flowed after she left and I prayed, "Lord, you know the desires of my heart. Help me find a way to make these good moments last longer."
To the working mom, hang in there. If there is any miraculous way you have the luxury of staying home when your kids are babies, do it. These moments are so few and so fleeting don’t miss it if you don’t have to. But if you’re like me, that luxury is not in the cards for today. For one reason or another, there are bills that need paid, benefits that need covered and skills that have to be maintained. You do it for your family so that they can have the life you did or didn’t have. You do it to share the load with your spouse to keep the financial stress out of your family. Whatever reason we work it’s because we’ve decided we have to. It’s not easy. It’s not always what we want, but we do what we have to do. To us I say: hang in there. Use your role in working to show your child good character, diligence, and hard work. (Stay at home moms are just as good in character, diligence and hard working if not more. So don’t take this as a hit against those that stay home. I’m just pointing out a way to use the need to work to build up our children). To the working mom I say: cherish every little moment. Cherish the midnight feedings, the 2 a.m. feedings, and the 4 a.m. feedings. Cherish the snuggles when they are sick, or tired, or cranky. Cherish the giggles, the milestones, the wonder, and the excitement. Cherish it all in the moments you do have. Write them all down so you can relive those moments again. To you I say: hang in there. Every moment away is hard and I get it. For me, every moment away is harder than the last. But I encourage you to press on. You are still a good mom. You are still a GREAT mom. And by creating these precious moments every day with your baby, they will always know how much you love them no matter how many moments you miss.